Transforming Thoughts

I am in awe at this moment, because God is completely transforming my thoughts.  I am attempting to let go.  I am attempting to be still.  It is difficult because I am a control freak, but today He has revealed His thoughts regarding His children are different from human thoughts.  He loves me and forgives me.  His wrath will not be poured down just because I believe I am too far gone for Him to ever forgive.  I view myself as a failure, unworthy,  and incapable.  I don't see that I am worth loving, but He does.  I want to spend time with the Lord and I want to know what He thinks of His creations.  

Matthew Henry wrote in his commentary, "This shall be in pursuance of God's purposes concerning them (Jeremiah 29:11): I know the thoughts that I think towards you. Known unto God are all his works, for known unto him are all his thoughts (Acts 15:18) and his works agree exactly with his thoughts; he does all according to the counsel of his will. We often do not know our own thoughts, nor know our own mind, but God is never at any uncertainty within himself. We are sometimes ready to fear that God's designs concerning us are all against us; but he knows the contrary concerning his own people, that they are thoughts of good and not of evil; even that which seems evil is designed for good. His thoughts are all working towards the expected end, which he will give in due time. The end they expect will come, though perhaps not when they expect it. Let them have patience till the fruit is ripe, and then they shall have it." 

I Shall Believe

Matt Brouwer from the album Unlearning

Come to me now
And lay Your hands over me
Will You find me tonight
Say it will be alright
And I will believe

Broken in two
And I know You're on to me
That I only come home
When I'm so all alone
But I do believe

(Chorus)
That not everything is gonna be
The way you think it ought to be
It seems like everytime I try and make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly You won't give up on me
And I shall believe
I shall believe

Open the door
And show me Your face tonight
I know it's true
No one heals me like You
And You hold the key

Never again will I turn away from You
I'm so heavy tonight
But Your love is alright
And I do believe

That not everything is gonna be
The way you think it ought to be
It seems like everytime I try and make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly You won't give up on me
And I shall believe
I shall believe

That not everything is gonna be
The way you think it ought to be
It seems like everytime I try and make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly You won't give up on me
And I shall believe
I shall believe

I shall believe
I shall believe